Month: November 2014

I See A Way Forward

A recent wobble resulted in my feeling particularly fragile and brought suicidal thoughts with it. After seeking support I started to see things I could do to improve my situation. I saw a way forward. Here I am in a desert beginning the trek from the darkness of night (where the suicidal thoughts live) towards the lighter place of day.

© northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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Urge To Hibernate

This image was not thought through beforehand. It’s just what came to me. I was juggling the desire to go out somewhere different versus the voice in my head which told me to stay home to keep myself safe. Outside is colourful and full of life, inside there is isolation and darkness. I thought of comfort, a place of safe nurturing and along came an angel.

© northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Tunnel Vision

This “vision” came to me whilst writing the morning pages (see book The Artists Way by Julia Cameron). It is an amalgamation of a number of images which have been on my mind recently. We see a tunnel of thoughts that my mind goes through when an anxious thought kicks in. I blame myself for putting myself into the situation which has caused the anxiety. I end up in a place of internal battle and self-hatred. I was unsure if the soldiers should be facing inwards or outwards. On the outside of the tunnel are things which can be used to manage and soothe the anxious thoughts; they represent grounding, support and self-soothing. Usually red, purple or black represent difficult feelings, but this particular shade of green felt critical in the vision.

The words in the tunnel read: Come this way. It’s the only way. You will be angry. You will be mad. It is your fault. You have done wrong. You caused the problem. You caused anxiety. You have failed. You must be punished. You deserve it. You are a failure. You are evil.

© northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Dare

This was another case of the words just coming to me. The words are a challenging response to suicidal thoughts.

© northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

With My Hands

Following It’s a Secret, my mind was busy with wanting to express self-harm through my art. With the thought of using my hands to harm myself, these words popped out and had to be committed to art.

© northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

It’s A Secret

It’s a Secret was created following a conversation at a drop-in. Someone directly asked another person what their mental health issue was, which isn’t generally a done thing among service users. The person asked shared their story and I was surprised to hear more commonalities with my issues than I expected. They also said that previously they wouldn’t have felt comfortable sharing the details with people. That got me thinking that actually, I am not comfortable in sharing my symptoms with other people. The word “secret” could be exchanged with “private”. The reality is that people can appear fine, but actually, they are experiencing difficult symptoms. I experience anxiety, fear and shame when I think of sharing this picture, but I want to share it because it raises important questions and awareness of mental health issues.

© northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Do No Wrong

I am aware that the punitive parent voice is particularly strong in my head. In this image I explored turning this voice into something concrete. The intention was to notice it from adult, but to hopefully avoid reinforcing the unhelpful voice.

© northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to northernrose17 and A Therapeutic Art Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.